


Cherish the Lows

by stuckwithasnakeboy



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-18
Updated: 2020-12-18
Packaged: 2021-03-11 02:15:29
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,781
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28157418
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/stuckwithasnakeboy/pseuds/stuckwithasnakeboy
Summary: Roman meets Virgil at a local theater and things become complicated when one finally gets the nerve to ask the other on a date
Relationships: Anxiety | Virgil Sanders/Creativity | Roman "Princey" Sanders, Deceit | Janus Sanders/Sleep | Remy Sanders, Logic | Logan Sanders/Morality | Patton Sanders
Comments: 2
Kudos: 5





	1. Chapter 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Roman wants to be alone while Janus craves his family

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Flashbacks

Janus had tried it all. He had tried music, the television, audio books, and everything else under the sun but nothing worked. He was alone in the house and no one was coming home soon. Dad was with Virgil. They were going to his audition and wouldn’t be back until late. Logan had gone to the store merely twenty minutes ago, he would spend at least thirty minutes shopping and he hadn’t even made it to the store yet. Janus was alone.

Normally he wouldn’t mind but as he rocked back and forth on the couch, a blanket wrapped around him, and his palms pressed firmly against his ears he wanted nothing more than for one of them to come home. He didn’t care who, he just needed someone. Not him though. No, anyone else but him. Anyone else, he didn’t care who but he didn’t need to be alone.

He could hear his words, his shouts, and his screams. He could feel him push him to the ground and he could feel his hand hit him. It was like it was all happening again. All because of that one commercial. That was all it took, one simple commercial for the cologne that he wore and it all rushed back to him. It was a combination of touch and sound this time. He was grateful his mind didn’t provide visuals, that with the combination of being alone would have been too much to handle.

All alone he sat in the living room, having to relive these horrible memories. He rocked himself back and forth, only taking his hands off his ears to tighten his blanket’s hold around him. He was completely and utterly alone.

Roman sat in his room, his phone in his hand when he saw it. His eyes lit up. This would be perfect! He could get Elliott to drive him or he could walk there himself if he must. He had needed something for so long and he had finally found it. This would be just his, no Mom, no step dad, no Remus. It could just be his.

He needed this and here it was. The last day for auditions was tomorrow but he could make it. He could do it. He could finally be alone! Not exactly alone but away from his family.

The timing could not be more perfect. It was September, getting closer and closer to October, and his own family was already raving about Christmas. As much as he loved the holiday he hated the stress. It’s why he loved October. It was a month before all the stress started to officially kick in. It was the one month of the year where he could be someone else and he loved acting so much.

He looked at the title of the play once again and his smile widened. His mom may not love it and his step dad certainly wouldn’t but he would. He and quickly took a screen shot before he sent it to Elliott.

[Right Brain]: Take me??

[Left Brain]: this is your christmas present

Roman smiled to himself as he fell backwards onto his bed, phone pressed against his chest. He was already feeling giddy. He quickly typed out his thanks to Elliott before he pressed the power button for his phone.

Finally, he’d be able to have some time away from his family.

Logan opened the door of the house with a sigh. He had forgotten his wallet. On the counter it sat so he walked over to grab it. However, that is when he noticed how quiet it was. Something was wrong.

His brows furrowed as he walked through the house. He opened the door to every room, looking for Janus. It wasn’t until he opened the door to his own room that he found him. Wrapped in the blankets and clutching something in his hand is where he found Janus.

He walked over but Janus did not move. He looked to be in some sort of trace. Logan knew exactly what had happened just from that alone. He couldn’t help but feel some sort of pity when the realization came to him.

“Jan,” he said, sitting down on the edge of the bed. Janus’s gaze snapped over to him. He looked at him for a moment before his breathing started to become faster and he started to move away. “Janus, it’s okay. I’m not going to hurt you.”

Janus stopped his movements and that’s when Logan saw what he had been holding, a stuffed animal that Virgil had gotten him for his birthday. He gave him a small smile. The being in his and Patton’s bedroom with the present from Virgil, it was obvious he didn’t want to be alone.

“Janus, you are safe,” he said. Janus continued to stare at him for several moments but then he latched onto Logan with no intent of letting him go.

He would not go to the store. Instead, he decided, he would stay there with his child in his arms. He wrapped his arms around Janus and held him close. He wasn’t sure what he was doing exactly, he didn’t give to many hugs to people that weren’t his husband, but he knew that Janus needed this so he would try his best.

They stayed like that for nearly an hour before Janus announced that he wanted to be in the living room. He knew that Dad and Virgil would be home soon and he wanted to be there for when the door opened. He didn’t want to have to worry about who had entered the house when he heard the door open. So, with Janus never letting go of Logan’s arm, the two walked downstairs.

When the door opened Janus’s gaze immediately went over to it and he relaxed when he saw who it was. A tall teenager with jet black hair and dressed in dark colors accompanied by a shorter man with light brown curls, it was Virgil and Dad. It was them and no one else. Janus allowed himself to let his grip on Logan’s arm release as he pulled the blanket around him closer.

"Heya, kiddo,“ Dad said, as Virgil closed the door behind them. "I think Virgil did great but he disagrees with me so can we all– what’s wrong?” he asked once he got close enough to see the redness that was still present on Janus’s face.

He dropped down on the couch and looked at his son for confirmation before he hugged him. “A stupid ad,” Janus said, pressing his face deeply into Dad’s chest as he heard footsteps go up the stairs.

Behind him Logan must have mouthed what had happened because then he felt Dad’s arms around him tighten. Then he heard footsteps descend downstairs. “The Bird Cage or Jumanji?” Virgil asked. Janus looked up from Dad’s chest to see him holding up two CD cases. Both had Robin Williams on the cover. Janus pointed to one and Virgil smiled. “For some reason I knew you’d pick Jumanji,” he said with a smirk-like smile.

Ten minutes later, they all sat on the couch. Virgil was holding a bowl of popcorn while Dad was wrapped in Logan’s arms and Janus was laying on Dad’s chest. From the opposite side of the couch Virgil was throwing popcorn to see if he could land some in Dad’s mouth. Most of it landed in between Dad and the couch, on the floor, or in Janus’s hair. He didn’t exactly mind though. He was surrounded by his family and he really needed them in that moment. Everything was fine, Janus was content and he wasn’t alone.


	2. Not Yet

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Roman can't help but notice how attractive the lead actor is.

Roman would, without a doubt, be able to tell you what his type was. He liked guys who were funny, liked theater, were more on the jock side of things, and were optimistic. He couldn’t explain why, with this being the case, that his eyes kept finding their way to the lead actor. He looked like the exact opposite and they weren’t even doing dress rehearsals yet. However, even if it was just his way of getting in character, he was also physically not his normal type either.

He was tall and thin. His hair was jet black and contrasted with his skin so pale it almost looked white. Over the past week Roman had noticed that he liked to wear dark colors or, perhaps, he was just using dark clothes as a way to get into character. Either way, he was not Roman’s normal type so why were his eyes continuing to find his way to him.

He was up on stage and he looked so radiant but somehow so shy and reserved at the same time. It was the perfect act. The confidence on stage but the ability to still show the character through it. It was a breathtaking sight.

All he could do was admire from the side lines. He had taken notice that the boy didn’t seem to be extremely social. He stayed by himself when he wasn’t needed on stage. He did nothing to try and socialize, during his breaks from stage and after rehearsals were done. He never spoke with anyone who wasn’t the director or the stage manager and he always had his head down looking at his script when his focus wasn’t on them.

He was two completely different people on stage verses off stage and it wasn’t just because of the character he played. Roman didn’t know how he knew but he did. It couldn’t be as simple as that. No, this person didn’t seem simple.

As he walked off stage Roman’s eyes finally left him. Virgil took a deep breath as he walked off and ran a hand through his hair. On stage he was comfortable, when he knew all his lines. He knew most of them, he was a fan of the musical and had done some deep research on it, but he did not know all of them. The ones he didn’t know where the ones he was more likely to trip over, even with the script in his hands and those small trip ups keep him awake at night.

He flipped the pages of his script until he got to his next scene. He took a deep breath as he started to look over the lines. He just needed to remember them so he didn’t have to look down at the script and he wouldn’t stutter.

He did look up though when he heard soft cursing. Ms. Argentina stood, wincing as he shook his finger. Virgil had taken note of the actor his grandparents had casted as Ms. Argentina the very first day when they did a read through of the script. He was tall but several inches shorter than Virgil, his brown hair was long but always pulled up, and while he seemed to be more on the jock side of things Virgil couldn’t wait to see him in a dress, just to see what he looked like.

Quickly, Virgil looked back down as to not get caught staring. He was actually rather confused at first. Why would they cast two teenage boys in the roles of two women? Then he saw him on stage. He was perfect for the character. He was able to quickly change from serious to fun-loving and still have the flirtatious attitude while he was being serious. Virgil was looking forward to when he knew all of his lines before the song, because then he could see the full extent of his abilities.

Then, hearing the end of the scene, Virgil got up and walked back towards the stage, waiting for his que. He took a deep breath and closed his eyes for a moment before opening them and walking on stage.

“You would not believe how amazing he was up on stage! I mean, wow,” Roman said, sitting upside down on Elliott’s bed.

"From how much you’ve gushed about this person–“ they looked up from their nails– "I’m going to assume that they were extraordinary, like an angel sent from the heavens.”

Roman, ignoring Elliott’s sarcastic tone, threw his hands up. “He was better than an angel! He was like a god! And his voice– oh god, his voice was just perfection!” Roman rolled over so he was laying on his stomach and looking at Elliott, waiting for them to say something.

They stayed silent and blew on their nails before they looked up. “Save those eyes for your crush,” they said, turning their attention back to their nails.

Roman slid off the bed and pulled his hair up in a bun. “Can you do my makeup?” he asked, causing them to raise an eyebrow.

They unlocked their phone, being cautious as to not smudge their nail polish. “It is almost eleven and you want me to do your makeup?” they asked, tilting their head to the side. Roman pulled his best pair of puppy eyes and they tried to resist the urge before they sighed, “Fine, but wait for my nails to dry.”

Roman smiled and ten minutes later Elliott was applying foundation onto Roman’s skin. “Why don’t you just ask them out?” Elliott asked. “Nearly everyone in theater is gay– well, not everyone but a large portion.”

"Have you met my family?“ Roman replied and Elliott pulled a face. "Exactly! I don’t want him to have to deal with that. They’re–” he struggled to find the right word– “a lot and they have a lot of beliefs that would make someone uncomfortable.”

Elliott stopped their movements and looked at Roman with a saddened expression. “Ro, you can’t let your family prevent you from being happy. Can you at least try? I mean, look at me and Mitchell. My family would hate if they knew we were in a relationship.”

“That’s because your family hates Mitchell,” Roman added, biting back words that he might regret. They were going to therapy to work out their problems, but from the crying over the phone around thirty minutes after these sessions were supposed to take place, Roman suspected that one party wasn’t holding up his end of the deal.

"True,“ Elliott added, "but despite that we still have our happy moments. Just promise me you’ll try. I’d hate to hear you moan and groan about how you should have asked him out when you had the chance.”

Roman rolled his eyes. “Maybe,” Elliott looked at him, eyebrow raised and clearly unimpressed. “Not yet.”


	3. Revelations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Virgil needs Janus's help while Roman and his teacher dread the upcoming class.

Janus and Virgil didn’t always get along. It had only been since Virgil was ten and Janus was eleven that they finally but aside their differences, let down a couple walls. However, this did not mean the two didn’t fight. They did but over the years it had turned into bickering instead of full blown fighting. Now, every so often, they would even go to each other for advice.

Janus sat on the couch, crocheting something Virgil didn’t know. He had his feet underneath him, he was wearing his lounging clothes, his phone sat on the arm rest beside him, he looked completely calm. It was normal for Janus to look calm and collected to anyone else but Virgil was not just any other person, he was someone who knew Janus well. He was dissociating, lost in a world of nothingness. His body going through motions it had went through many times before, needing no help from his mind.

Virgil walked around to the other side of the couch and sat down. He was careful in doing his best to not disturb Janus. However, that didn’t seem to be the case because he heard a deep in take of breath and looked over to see Janus shaking his head and blinking rapidly before he started to look around. After a moment of realization, Janus relaxed back into the couch.

He picked up his crochet hook and glanced over at Virgil. He continued on with his work, looking over at Virgil every so often. “Okay, what do you want?” he asked after three minutes of silence. “Don’t give me that look. You haven’t even pulled out your phone. What do you want?”

Sighing, Virgil confessed, “I need your help with my Lydia outfit.” He risked glancing up and saw the smile that was etching it’s way onto Janus’s face. He really didn’t want to feed into his brother’s ego but he needed the help.

“Movie, musical, or cartoon?” he asked causing Virgil to raise an eyebrow. “Do you want it to be more like from the movie, musical or cartoon? The musical is what you’re in but that outfit looks so uncomfortable and I doubt you’d look forward to wearing it, the movie would be the easiest to pull from, and while the cartoon would be fun to pull from it has a lot more color than the other two. It’s your call.”

Virgil thought on it for a moment. He weighed his option in each hand, trying his best to figure out which one was weighted comfortably. “Could you do a combination of the movie and the musical?” he asked and Janus stopped his crocheting.

He placed his work aside and turned to face Virgil. Offense was written all of his features and Virgil found a new interest in the ceiling. “Are you really doubting my abilities, Virgil Sanders?” then Virgil let out a breath, he was being playful. The tone of his voice wasn’t at all one of menacing but it was light and filled with sass.

Virgil grabbed the pillow that was behind him and hit Janus with it causing him to make a noise of surprise. “Don’t do that! You idiot, I thought you were mad!” Virgil said as Janus recovered from the shock.

Janus reached over and fought with Virgil for a moment before the pillow was in his hand. “Don’t hit me, you jackass!” he said, hitting Virgil with every word.

Seeing a pillow on Pa’s chair Virgil ran forward and grabbed it. “Then don’t scare me!” he retorted, hitting Janus back.

Janus smiled, trying his best to look mad but the smile fought it’s way onto his face. “That’s it! You’re dead,” Janus said, swinging his own pillow back to hit Virgil. However, he moved to the side before the pillow made contact with him.

Roman wasn’t known for being the quietest of students. He did well in school, his grades were fairly average but he wasn’t one of the quiet ones. That was unless he was in Mr. Sanders class.

Roman never risked getting on Mr. Sanders’s bad side. He had heard rumors and he didn’t want to see if they were true. Instead he kept his head down like everyone else one that class, even his brother.

He paused for a moment before he walked in. He quickly went to his seat and grabbed his books for class before he risked looking up. Mr. Sanders was writing something on the board in his neat and small but very readable handwriting. He had the cleanest handwriting of any teacher and it had slightly shocked Roman when he learned the man was left handed.

However, Mr. Sanders was a lot of things. He didn’t show much emotion but Roman had picked up on some small mannerisms that gave away some of his thoughts. When he was impressed or feeling particularly passionate about a topic, his hands would clasp behind his back. When he was puzzled and/or confused his hands would find their way linked together directly in front of the middle of his chest. On the rare occasion a student dared to question his teachings, he would either continue on walking about the classroom or sit at his desk, his placed beside each other in a praying like manner. These were his small tells and Roman prided himself in knowing them.

Mr. Sanders did look the part of a teacher. He wore a black shirt, either a polo or a dress shirt, that somehow didn’t look harsh against his pale completion. It was always paired with a blue tie, the tie differed in patterns and shades but it was always, without fail, blue. His shirt was always tucked into his pants. Though the pants differed like the shirts and they seemed to differ based on the shirt Mr. Sanders wore. On days he wore the polo it was paired with blue jeans and the dress shirts were paired with black pants. He even wore glasses. They had a black, square frame and his hair had a habit of falling over the lenses but he had long perfected the art of being able to get the hair back into place without pausing or his glasses falling off with a mere flick of his head.

Mr. Sanders seemed robotic in ways and that completely terrified Roman.

He couldn’t wait for the class to end. He had study hall right after and he had it with Elliott. He yearned for the comfort their presence gave him.

He could not wait for class to end and he wasn’t the only one.

Logan absolutely adored his children and he would do anything for them. He would figure out a way to move the sun if they wished but driving to pick up Virgil the night before had done a number on him. It wasn’t because Virgil had done anything wrong. No, in fact, it was quite the opposite. Virgil had done nothing wrong and with Patton working late and Janus asleep already they had no reason to be home at a decent hour, or they had rather forgotten that work and school existed.

The two tried their best to catch up on some much needed alone time. They stayed out, listening to music that gave both of them nostalgia and went to watch a movie. They drove across the county to go to their favorite restaurant and came home to a sleeping house.

Logan could still hear Patton’s groggy, half awake voice when he crawled into bed close to four in the morning. However, he had a fun night with his son. Now he was having a hellish day at school, having ran out of coffee and running on barely three hours of sleep.

He wanted class to end, yearned for it. He had barely even been able to pull his shirt over his head. He always had the recommended amount of sleep and last night was the first night in several months that that had not happened. He wasn’t as young as he used to be and he couldn’t wait for class to be over.

**Author's Note:**

> Warning: Flashbacks


End file.
